We now rejoin Harmon Stoltzfus III on a Saturday night in August as he attempts to end his date with Millie Miller. The date had taken place at a McDonalds in
Harmon and Millie drove down Route 30. The radio was still tuned to FM97 and Harmon was sick of it so he switched to a country station. At least he could stand country. A song was playing about little white tank tops and when Millie heard it she got a dreamy look in her eyes and gazed at Harmon. “Oh, Harmon,” she said, “I always thought about you when I heard this song.”
Harmon was amazed to hear that Millie listened to country music. “Do you listen to the radio?” he asked.
“Well I’m not supposed to and I know our church standards say we can’t, but I listen to I105 when I’m driving around,” she replied. “I don’t have an antenna but I can catch that station without one.” And sometimes I stick in a hair pin and then I can hear a few more stations.”
“Well I think that’s dumb,” Harmon said. Millie said she’s trying to stop.
Harmon turned onto 897 and he was wracking his brain for a final solution. Everything he had tried had failed. He was literally out of Ideas. What else can I do? he thought. Maybe I could just stop and throw her out of the car. But Millie wasn’t a small girl. She wasn’t fat or anything, just a little big boned and Harmon didn’t know if he could physically remove her. Plus, he decided that wouldn’t be a Christian thing to do.
So he kept driving.
“Harmon, look at the stars.” It’s so beautiful,” Millie said as she gazed out the open window. “Let’s go over to the park and go on a walk.”
Harmon’s hands almost started shaking when she said this. He didn’t want to go on a walk. He wanted to take Millie home and get this date over with. He tried to say something but nothing came out. He looked at Millie and her eagerness made him look away quickly.
Finally he said, “Well, um, Millie, it’s Saturday night and tomorrow we have church.” I don’t think we should stay out late.” I feel like we got to know each other pretty good already.” I think we should go home and maybe we can do that some other time.”
When these words came out of his mouth he wanted to take them back immediately. Millie was going to take this as an invitation to another date and he didn’t want that.
Millie looked at Harmon for awhile and then she agreed that it might be good to go home because it was Saturday night. Harmon decided his chances of angering Millie were over so he headed for Intercourse and didn’t say much. Millie was chattering away.
“I can’t wait to tell all my friends tomorrow at church that we’re dating.” It’s going to be so much fun to have a boyfriend.” I liked you since I was 15 and now I’m finally going out with you.”
When Harmon heard that she was planning to tell all her friends, his heart fell into his stomach for about the 50th time that evening. “Maybe we could just keep it a secret,” he suggested. “It could be our own personal secret for awhile and that would be so neat.”
Millie immediately agreed that it would be a good idea to keep their love a secret for awhile. Harmon felt good about that. At least I won’t be embarrassed tomorrow, he thought.
Harmon finally got to Millie’s house east of Intercourse. He couldn’t wait to get Millie out of his car, but she just wouldn’t get out. Finally Harmon told her bluntly, “get out of my car now.”
Millie looked slightly shocked, but she obeyed. She walked into the house with a huge smile on her face. Visions of wedding bells and babies were going through her head. Harmon drove out the driveway trying to devise a new strategy to get rid of her. His plans had failed miserably and he was in need of some help.
As Harmon drove along 340 he was thinking about Millie and he was thinking about Arvilla. If only I was going out with Arvilla I’d be happy. She’s the only one I want.
He thought about her eyes and her smile. And when she talks my heart melts. He took out his phone and scrolled through the contacts until he got to Arvilla’s number. His finger rubbed the SEND button and he thought about pushing it. But he knew he wasn’t going to. He knew he’d have to get rid of Eager before he could even think about calling Arvilla again.
It was 10:15 and Harmon didn’t feel like going home so he called Willard to see what he was doing. He was at Henry’s house in Ronks watching a movie so Harmon drove over there.
Willard and Henry were crouched in front of Willard’s laptop computer. They were watching Cheaper by the Dozen. Harmon crouched with them and watched the movie. It was hard to hear it because Henry’s dad didn’t want him to watch movies so the volume was low. Harmon enjoyed the movie. It felt good to laugh and forget all about his girl problems for awhile.
When the movie was over he told his two best friends about his date with Millie. He knew he could trust them because they had been friends since childhood. They were both 19. Henry had blond hair and looked pretty nice. Most girls thought he was dumb because he always said the wrong thing at the wrong time. He had a mole on his right cheek. The mole annoyed Harmon, but he was used to it because Henry was his friend.
Willard was a dark haired young man. He looked simple but was pretty smart. Most girls thought he was cool. He was a little liberal in many of his views though and that scared a few of them.
Willard, Henry, and Harmon spent a lot of their time together. They could be found driving up and down 340 in Henry’s Ford Ranger on many summer nights. They enjoyed crashing Amish parties, going to youth activities, and watching TV at Wal-Mart. They also had one other thing in common: they all were in love with Arvilla Beiler. Neither of them ever admitted this to each other, but we as readers are allowed to know it.
Willard and Henry sat rapt as Harmon told them about his dad’s stunning demand and his ensuing date with Millie. They laughed harder than they had while watching Cheaper by the Dozen when they heard how the Mexican family chased Harmon and Millie from the McDonalds. At one point Henry’s dad came to the door and asked if everything was ok in there.
“What are you going to do?” asked Henry.
“I don’t know,” said Harmon, “That’s why I told you guys.” What should I do?”
“I think you should just kick her till she gets mad at you and breaks up with you,” Willard suggested.
“Why don’t you tell her you’re in love with someone else?” said Henry.
“Who?”
All three of the boys thought about saying “Arvilla” but neither of them did. Finally Willard said, “Jenny.”
Jenny was nice and dateable but Harmon knew Millie wouldn’t believe him if he told her he was in love with her.
“Why don’t you whack her?”
“Yeah, I heard there’s this Amish guy in Kinzers who will whack people for a fee,” Willard said. He was chuckling as he said it.
The boys knew they couldn’t whack Millie and they didn’t really want too, but they talked about doing it for awhile.
“Well, why don’t you just call her and break up with her?” asked Henry. “I don’t know much about girls but that seems like the easiest thing to do.”
Harmon thought about this idea for awhile. “But I can’t because then my Dad’s gonna kick me outta the house.” And I don’t want that either.”
The boys weren’t any closer to a solution when 11:00 rolled around and Henry’s mom came to the door and said it was high time for the boys to go home so Henry could go to bed. Harmon had an 11:30 curfew so it was time for him to go home anyway.
When he got home his father was still up reading in the living room. Harmon took off his shoes and tried to sneak past him so he wouldn’t have to talk to him. But Harmon II’s fatherly ears heard Harmon III’s footsteps and he said, “Son, why don’t you sit down and tell me about your date.”
Harmon groaned as he sat on the couch. “Well it was OK. We went to a restaurant and talked and we both decided we’re not meant for each other.”
“Don’t lie to me boy.” Harmon II said. “Mr. Miller called me and told me Millie is excited to be your girlfriend.” She is a nice girl and you will keep dating her or you will be forced to go live with my brother Abner in
Harmon shuttered. Abner was a nut job who owned a rabbit farm. Living in
Harmon left his father’s side and went upstairs. Pete was waiting for him there. He was still mad at Harmon for humiliating him in the barn a week earlier, and now he was even madder because Harmon had a date. Pete never had a date and probably never would. He was mad so he hit Harmon with a pillow and kicked him for awhile. Then he got tired of beating up his brother so he quit. Harmon calmly took the beating because he was too tired to resist. He went to sleep with a heavy heart. He dreamed of Arvilla but Millie was also in the dream and she was married to him. It was not a restful night.
The next day was Sunday and Harmon woke up with a headache. He went to church with Gloria and Pete and Pharon. They went in the little black Escort because Pete wanted to save gas. The Stoltzfus family attended Bird in Hand Amish Mennonite Church on the outskirts of Bird in Hand. The church had an attendance of about 150.
Harmon walked into church and sat on the men’s side. The Men sat on one side and the women sat on the other side. Harmon and almost everyone else thought this was dumb but they kept doing it because some traditions were hard to change.
During Sunday School the church split up into a bunch of different classes. Harmon went to the youth boy’s class and it was pretty interesting. His teacher was Fred Beiler and he was quite smart. They talked about Peter and the fishing boat and Sylvester and Karl tried to say smart things. Harmon sat there and said a few things. Everyone looked at him with a dazed look in their eyes when he said, “I think Peter was weird.”
Harmon stole a few glances at the girl’s class. He was hoping to catch Arvilla’s eyes but he had no luck. Arvilla was wearing a green dress that made here eyes even greener. One time he caught Millie looking at him so he quickly looked back to his Bible and never looked at the girls again.
After Sunday School everyone went back upstairs for the sermon. Pastor Reihl preached a good sermon. It was about Isaac and Rebecca and Harmon was glad he didn’t live in Bible times because he really didn’t like the match his dad had made for him. Pastor Reihl was a good man but Harmon couldn’t take him seriously because he looked so much like Abe Lincoln.
When the congregation knelt for prayer, Harmon looked across the aisle at the women’s side. The girls sat across from the boys near the front of the church. He was looking for Arvilla again. This time he had more luck. As his head turned toward the girls, Arvilla’s head turned toward the boys. For a second their eyes met. Then she put her head down to pray and Harmon put his head down too. His heart was pounding wildly and he wasn’t praying. He was thinking about how she looked. He was thinking about how beautiful she was. He prayed she would look at him again when they stood up. The prayer ended. He looked over. She looked back! Only for a second.
The preachers and a few other men were giving testimony after prayer and Harmon wasn’t listening to them. His heart was gushing. Suddenly he was brought back to reality when he heard his Father’s voice.
“I really liked the Sermon.” I think we can learn a lot from Isaac and Rebecca.” Harmon II talked for awhile. Harmon was always embarrassed when his dad talked.
Then He said something that would change Harmon’s life forever. “….and on a side note I’d like to let the congregation know that my son Harmon is dating Millie Miller.”
Harmon could hardly breathe when he heard this. He started sweating. He wanted to get up and run out of the church. The joy he had felt only a few moments earlier was now replaced with a horrible feeling of suffocation. His plan of breaking up with Millie before everyone knew about them was now doomed. He looked wildly around and when he looked over toward the girls, he saw Millie and she had a huge smile on her face and she was looking right at him.
Harmon took a deep breath, took a song book from the rack and helped the congregation sing the closing song. He wished the song would last forever so he wouldn’t have to face the after church music. (by iw 4/28/07 to be continued)
Read Our Hero Harmon next week to see what happened after church. Plus see how Arvilla feels about Harmon dating Millie.